Meeting People

I'm possibly reflecting my setting, or my age group, or my sense of oddity relative to, what seems to be, a norm, but I find it ever so intolerable to meet people with a complex about themselves. What do I mean by a "complex about themselves"? Well, I'll tell ya!

I'm referring to people who you speak to for a time and then they simply... stop. Now, my immediate thought might be - I am doing something wrong. Let me express some confidence in who I am and iterate that I do not think I am doing anything wrong save for being myself (which, admittedly, can be, or so I've heard, intimidating). I enjoy meeting people and make some effort to learn who they are - no matter what they look like or, generally, how they express themselves. Usually, this is received with open arms, but as time passes, it seems that the novelty of learning about someone wears off and almost always the other person simply stops communicating. Now, I'm not the type of person to push the issue. I simply give it one good attempt and if I see there will be no response in the future - I dismiss.

What bothers me is how quickly people seem to lose interest in others; the need for constant entertainment and "playing one's cards" juuuuust right is more than annoying, actually, rather angering. I don't mean to say that I am angry at any individual person, but it makes me angry to know there are a large number of people (based on my sample size) that need to be spoken to in a particular way to which they remained entertained by your person - hear me when I say this: that is pathetic.

I could absolutely make an argument that we are always in a state of "selling" ourselves to others, but the level of discreet disrespect people have for one another, as if saying, "I'm bored of you, I won't speak to you any longer" is so common it is nearly expected, save for the shred of hope that you meet one of those few who actually appreciate your existence for what/who you are without heaping their expectations upon you.

My thoughts are scattered right now, but this is more of an expression of disdain for behavior of that caliber. On a personal level, it does not bother me, because after I realize I have been "shut out", I simply "delete" in my mind. I have had people contact me (months, or even a year, later) when they were (as admitted by them) bored as if expecting me to entertain them again. These people... man, oh, man.. I refuse to play the game. It comes off as disgustingly immature.

My fear, however, is that although I put stipulations that this may be a particular group (or age) of people, this is an occurrence throughout life that will persist regardless of location, age, culture (and on). In that case, hold onto those who will stand by you and put, even a small, effort into your interpersonal relationship.

Honestly, I have plenty more to say (shocker..), but I am tired and my mind isn't functioning all that optimally at the moment. Rest assured, I will touch on the subject again in the future as it is something that I notice over and over again - not necessarily to me, but to a multitude of people (almost as if there is a hierarchy with the most genuine at the bottom and the spoiled/egoistical at the top). Oh well, in the end, it should have no impact on your emotional well being as these encounters should be as dust wiped off your shoulder.

Listening to: "Recursive Self- Improvement" by How to Destroy Angels (sort of fitting, in a way)